It may happen one gloomy November Wednesday, according to a news item at Comics Nexus. Cassandra Cain may emerge from the shadows as the last leaves of fall skitter across Gotham City rooftops, the cold, damp wind whipping her black hair as she glares purposefully at the urban nightmare below, the old familiar violent urges rising in her battered soul...
Good lord, could I possibly go more purple? Yes, once again some crazy, never-say-die fool has asked DC staffers about Cass Cain at a comic convention panel, and once again they've given the corporate maybe. during a Q-and-A at the 2010 San Diego Comic Con, Batman group editor Mike Marts allegedly said we might see Cass sometime in November. This is really getting to be something of a running joke. I wonder if the people at Subway ask him, "Would you like cheese on your turkey sandwich and will Cassandra Cain be coming back to continuity anytime soon?"
"Yes to your first question on the cheese, noncommital answer that isn't exactly a no but also isn't an outright lying promise yes so my personal sense of integrity remains intact and will hopefully prevent you insane Cass fans from stabbing me through the heart with a replica batarang to the second."
Comics Nexus asks, "But, where is the question. So many choices to choose from. So, where do you think Cassie’ll turn up and what will her nom de guerre be?"
I think she'll turn up in Birds of Prey and her new codename will be "Once Awesome Character Reduced to a Pathetic Shell by Editorial Fiat and Scripter Incompetence Girl." They'll bring in special Batgirl expert Adam Beechen to story-consult, and Ed Benes will draw her as a 30-year-old stripper with gigantic half-bowling balls serving as her breast implants; her skin will be colored brownish to indicate indeterminate, i.e., non-European ethnicity; her height will appear to alternate between 5'10" and 9'; every panel in which she appears will show her chest and her buttocks simultaneously; she will frequently seem to be floating, sometimes impossibly close-- unless she truly does exist in a two-dimensional reality-- to whatever oddly-designed piece of furniture or bizarre, non-functional looking high tech equipment she's near or on or over; and she'll trip and fall to her death under a runaway steamroller, forever settling the question of "What plans does DC have regarding Cassandra Cain in the future?"
All in the space of a single page. Thanking you in advance, DC.